
Here's one my dad told me recently:
Duck: do you have any bread?
Bartender: none
Duck: any buns?
Bartender: we don't have any bread.
Duck: any old bread?
Bartender: no.
Duck brown bread?
Bartender: we don't have any bread!
Duck: any-
Bartender: listen, if you ask for bread one more time, I'm gonna nail your beak to this table!
Duck: do you have a hammer?
Bartender: why would we keep a hammer? No we don't!
Duck: What about some bread?