Celtic Heroes

What did one butt cheek say to the other?
Together we can stop this sh*t

Some good efforts so far but nothing really tickling me.

Let's give this thread until 6pm on Friday, in British Summer Time.

Who's our next president Hillary Clinton or Donald Trump?

A high school wrestler was about to wrestle in the state championship. His opponent was undefeated because of a special move he had called "The Pretzel". His coach told him "whatever you do, do not let him get you in the pretzel! No one has ever gotten out of it before and you will lose.

So the match starts and sure enough just a few moments into the match, the opponent gets him in the pretzel! Everyone is freaking out! The coach is yelling "noooo! We're going to lose!!!" Then all of a suddon the kid breaks out of the pretzel pins the opponent and wins the match! Everyone is cheering!

The coach can't believe it! He runs up to the kid and says "how did you do that?! No one has ever gotten out of the pretzel before!!" The kid said "well coach, I was laying there and I looked up and saw a pair of balls hanging there.... So I bit them!! And let me tell you something coach, you don't know your own strength until you bite your own balls..."

A high school wrestler was about to wrestle in the state championship. His opponent was undefeated because of a special move he had called "The Pretzel". His coach told him "whatever you do, do not let him get you in the pretzel! No one has ever gotten out of it before and you will lose.

So the match starts and sure enough just a few moments into the match, the opponent gets him in the pretzel! Everyone is freaking out! The coach is yelling "noooo! We're going to lose!!!" Then all of a suddon the kid breaks out of the pretzel pins the opponent and wins the match! Everyone is cheering!

The coach can't believe it! He runs up to the kid and says "how did you do that?! No one has ever gotten out of the pretzel before!!" The kid said "well coach, I was laying there and I looked up and saw a pair of balls hanging there.... So I bit them!! And let me tell you something coach, you don't know your own strength until you bite your own balls..."

Oml ._.

What did the hurricane say to the palm tree?
"Hang onto your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job"

What is black, white, and red all over?
Two nuns in a chainsaw fight

A crook mistakenly made a counterfeit $8 bill instead of a $10 bill. He decided to try it out anyway, so he went to the bank and asked for change.
The teller looked at the $8 bill and gave the crook two $4 bills as change.

An OTM worker is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The Otm worker turns around.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?"
"I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm waiting in line."
"Well, I work for otm, but you don't see me screwing the guy in front of me, do you?"


Hehe the original joke is a lawyer instead of the otm worker but i mixed it up a bit due to all the rage at otm recently... i love otm and their game dont take this seriously lol

This girl came up to me today and said she'd do anything for 10 dollars. Guess who got their car washed

Zonn wins then.